Marriages in India are not in their simplest form. When couples tie their knot, their respective families also get tied in a relationship knot. Unlike most of the European families Indian families follow joint family structure commonly. A whole family structure consist grandparents, parents, husband-wife and their children. In Indian Context a Home is a place where Three generations are living happily together.
Arrange marriages, in which parents decide the couples to marry each other, are common practice in India. In some cases Husband and wives come to know one another on their honeymoon. So, Matching interest and knowing each other is a far cry. In India, most of the couple marries first and then come to know each other and here starts the root problem. Indian women are told since childhood to adjust with their husband and the in-laws. She is expected to make all the adjustment required and hence a problem arises.
Increasing rate of Divorce appeals is alarm bell for sleeping society. Couples want get rid of their dissatisfactory married lives. Its Matter of great debate that why divorce rate is surging up. This is a problem which has Solution in debates and Talks.
Let’s have a look on the problems can come before a couple:
Society related problems:
Society systems were established more than 3000 years ago. Since then more than thirty centuries have passed and the system established according to the need of that time looks weak and useless. Caste system and untouchable practice is no longer relevant for society. But Still Indian Society believes in Marriage in similar caste. There are ample cases of murders and other brutal act performed upon persons went against it. In Haryana (a state in Northern India) alone a more than 40 cases of brutal act were filed in last 2 years. Not only Haryana; Punjab, Uttar Pradesh, Rajasthan are also among the highly reported states where social communities done an act of collective guilt.
Inter-religion marriages were least successful in recent past because either of the wedded partners was not comfortable with other religion. Though India is a secular country and every Indian citizen has rights to choose his/her religion, but the fact is somewhere else. Changing religion is a sin and highly unacceptable by society. There are even worse cases filed with couples did interrelation marriages. Though there are few successful example of inter-religion marriages but the facts has blood tears.
Society compares and curses the couples without scion and in most of the cases society blames the female partner for it. In most of the cases society and its rule plays a dominant role in Individuals life and creates many problems for them.
Problems related to Family:
As discussed in above text Family has important influence in Indian Wedding. In most cases parent decides the partner for their son/daughter and sometime they prefer other aspects more than a compatible match. This leads to dissatisfaction in marriage life. Moreover relationships require some secluded moments which are bound to be compromised with this family structure.
Some demanding families even ask for a heavy dowry and forces Female to bring amount of money from her family. Asking for dowry and harassing women for this is punishable offence but even today this is in Common practice.
There are few cases where wives are dominant, few other problems arises. It seen in common that there is always catfights between mother-in-law and daughter in law. This sometimes leads to Undue family quarrels. There are many other common problems where couples find it difficult to cope up with parents or family.
Problem related to Children:
It’s a common saying in India that ‘when ends the first thing disappears from life honeymoon is Love and life begins with Childs and their cry.” Childs sometime become a quarrel cause in India. Girls child are less expected in few Indian region and the mother with girl child get cursed by in laws Family. Sometimes children don’t want their single widow mother/father to tie their knot again. Widow marriage is Legal but Children and society in most cases opposes it. A Barren Women is treated as witch in Indian Society and many persons do not prefer them to invite on auspicious occasions.
There are many other problems like scarcity of money, Conflict of individual interest and various others are there which a Couple can resolve on themselves only. But problems caused Society and family must be taken seriously. Finding root causes and destroying it very much important to live a happy marriage life.
Though there are many Laws against Dowry, Honor killing (Term used for murders just for sake of community reputation) and other Domestic and social Violence, But very few are effective. To build a strong society it’s important to insure proper implementation of laws. A safe and fair society can ground a successful marriage. Indian Government is committed to provide security to couples marrying Inter-caste. Government is planning to make counseling offices to settle the family matter and issues.
A society, where women have equal rights as a man, grows faster. India has witnessed Bad Phases for Its Girl child. An equal sex ratio can solve many problems. Governments cannot do anything until society and families do not understand the space required for successful marriage life.
A more free and modern approach towards marriage system is required in Modern world. Indian citizen get voting rights in age of 18 and minimum acceptable age for marrying is 18 years for girls and 21 years for boys respectively. That means they are smart enough to choose their life partner. Putting pressure to marry an unknown partner can lead them to dissatisfaction. Every Man/women has rights to choose his/her life partner. Society and family can Guide them to the right one but cannot control them. A More open approach towards sex discussion and sex educations is important to resolve queries of an adolescent to put him on a right path. All socio-economic problems can be resolved by interaction so willingness to have a chat over any typical barring Issue can lead a couple to Favorable happy results.
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